Nutrition: 100%

Training: 80% (a legs day and had insufficient weight available to push as hard as I’d've liked)

Meditation: 33% (watched Lost last night at a friends – that went till 11pm, so by the time I got home, it was really late)

Today was a good day training. It was abs day. I pushed pretty hard… and I can feel the burn!

On a sidenote – and this is something I mentioned yesterday as a change I want to make… I removed the ZMAs for the diet, and replaced it with a caesin and whey shake. I was looking at the label for the ZMAs today, and what they do is boost the body’s testosterone levels… and I think that’s what’s been throwing me off – with the mental fogginess.

I’ve always found that I struggle when my testosterone levels are boosted too high. I get more aggressive, assertive, less clear. I get a bit more defensive and trigger happy. And now is very much the wrong time for that all to be happening, given the anxiety over the gym. The increased testosterone is magnifying the anxiety and attention focussed on the gym. Which is a very bad thing.

I feel satisfied now that I know what’s happening – that I’m not feeling foggy because of greater focus on the gym, but because my hormones are artificially out of whack, and that’s impacting on everyday things.

I’ve removed ZMAs from the diet, and hope to see me get back into balance in a few days… potentially by the weekend, potentially for early next week, because I know it always takes some time for the body to detox itself from it.

On an extremely positive note – I’m learning that I have this acute awareness of my body’s equilibrium. I know exactly when it’s off balance… whether that’s mental or physical. More so mental than physical. I think everything knows when they’re physically less than optimal. But then – I would also add in the fact that understanding nutrition better and better has helped me to know how to cultivate a good internal chemistry that just feels amazing… I know keenly sense when I’ve eaten bad – and can sense the sugar rushes, highs, etc… far more acutely than I’ve ever been able to before.

I’m not saying that this awareness is immediate… it takes time for me to realize I’m off-kilter. Like with the ZMAs: I knew that something was wrong… but couldn’t put my finger on it… then the mind made the appropriate connections and it popped top of mind, and then I acted on it. But from a high level, I’m extremely grateful to be developing this sense of equilibrium, and bringing it more actively into every situation I’m in. Day to day. This is good. And a very unexpected side-effect of the training!